“The biggest trap is to lose sight of the things that we’ve grown accustomed to having in our lives.”

I vividly remember my first car. A tan 1999 Honda Accord. With a sunroof. It was a hand-me-down from my mom as a sophomore in high school, but that didn’t matter. When I first got in the driver’s seat, I felt like I was mad max, gone in 60 seconds and living fast and furious all in one. 

I took pride in my car. I’d always take it to the car wash, vacuum out the inside and throw in a fresh pine tree scented air freshener for the good finishing feng shui. I couldn’t wait to show her off to all my friends and drive around cute girls in the passenger and back seats all at once. My neighbors in my little home town of Green, Ohio knew I was pulling in the hood when they heard 50 cent asking 21 questions through the subwoofers rattling in my trunk.

I was on top of the world.

After only a few months, let’s just say that my parents weren’t happy that the smell of pine trees was replaced with something else. Or the night the police officer followed me home because I was doing…umm…ahem…stupid high speeds on the highway racing against my best friend.

At first I’d always keep a full gas tank. Eventually I’d play roulette driving with the gas light warning on until I lost my chips just half a mile from the nearest gas station.

My point is that the feelings I had for my new car quickly shifted from gratitude and appreciation to carelessness and negligence. 

How come we get so excited for things only to lose that feeling in the snap of a finger once we’re used to finally having it?

Impermanence

Every stage of life has its positives and negatives, but none of it is permanent. Absolutely nothing. 

Recognize that the positives are great when they are in front of you and to appreciate them because they won’t last forever. On the flip side, the negatives suck too, but they won’t last forever either, so don’t get hung up on them and miss the good that’s right next to it.

The biggest lesson came on August 8th this year. 

I had one of the coolest jobs working on Front Street in Maui selling wind spinners to tourists just a quarter mile from the ocean. I had a great job working at The Block Maui doing what I do best and being people’s hype man for an intense one hour workout where we all got sweaty together and hugged after. 

For the record, sweaty hugs are always acceptable and encouraged.

I lived in a beautiful home with an ocean view from my bed where I could watch the sun set in between the islands of Molokai and Lanai. I had some of the best roommates, friends, co-workers and complete strangers that came into my life so quickly that created the lemonade out of squeezing life’s lemons.

I had it MADE.

Then out of the blue, one day of wildfires literally took that all away in the blink of an eye.

Front street is gone, house is destroyed, gym is temporarily inoperable, people all scattered across the islands or back to the mainland, and none of us are the same humans we once were. We were left either homeless, unemployed, depressed or all of the above.

The deck was reshuffled in a matter of 24 hours and many of us had to start from scratch.

Fast Forward

I’m sitting here on the Big Island of Hawaii 2 months later writing this as my family is having Thanksgiving in Ohio thinking how I absolutely cannot wait to see them for Christmas. I’m picturing sitting around the fireplace watching old home videos on VHS consuming a healthy amount of wine and talking story. I cannot wait.

I’m thinking of how blessed I am to have people who came to the big island from Lahaina who can understand the emotions we’re all going through after everything that happened. To give thanks for each other and the simple things over a Friendsgiving event that ends with eight of us around the table explaining the rules of beer hockey ten times over an hour’s time before we ever end up playing…because we all have the attention span of 4-year old children.

I’m thinking of how thankful I am to go to sleep next to a beautiful woman who loves me despite all of this craziness and the uncertainty with what comes next in both of our spontaneous and nomadic lives that go with the wind like Pocahontas met Marco Polo. This is very on brand for us, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I’m thinking of how excited I am to come back to Hawaii in January to live in this beautiful place where I can watch the sunset over the ocean from the avocado and coffee bean farm. With so many opportunities ahead of me to grow my fitness business, learn new trades, maybe work on a boat and nurture the relationships with the soulful people I’ve had a chance to meet in the recent month.

I had it made and lost it all…but I look at what I’m writing and realize that I actually still have it made.

Again, none of this is permanent. You can always lose it all. The time will come where we will have to part ways with any or all of these things. We all have to come face to face with God at some point, after all. 

You can choose to observe the uncertainty and anxiety that comes with up-ending your life for a brand new one completely, or you can choose to appreciate the beauty and excitement of it.

You can choose to obsess over things that are out of your control, or you can choose to let go, respect the universe and trust that the ride you’re on will take you where you need to go.

You can choose to appreciate the seasons of life, or you can complain about the weather.

For the past, the present and the future – I simply choose to give thanks.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.